Visits to the old school of living

There is no meaning any more

To use the old school

They have corrupted

Their credibility

And again not knowing

Not questioning their belief

Made them fail

And fall

At night

I am playing the foul

So I can stay cool

No mind, mindlessness

Is better than mindfulness

Eternal stars visit me

At night

Repeating old stories

As long I stay awake

The Truth?

When is  the truth important?

Truth will not make us happy

Truth will make us free

Free to make choices

Based on correct fact

But only in one dimension

The odd boy

I feel your pain

Through the centuries

I could have been me

The naked child left on balcony

Left to die

Forgotten but remembered

Still with me

In my dreams

At night

My Family

They will tell you that you are sick

Aggressive, crazy not to be trusted

They send you to the doctor

The family making their projection on the boy

Something is wrong with him

And the world out there is so dangerous

Let´s keep him calm

You are wrong, amphetamine will make you a good boy

You are bad because you are a boy

We despise you for what you are

We will make you sick

And that is good

We do not take any care

We do not want to see

We are blind, pretending

We reward everyone that pretends

We hate and smile

When we kill you

It will be for your own best

And we will mourn


Growing up

I grow up fearing everyone

My father did see my mother and her family inside me

Sometimes beating me, sometimes telling how wrong and clumsy I was

My mother hated all male on earth

My grandmother thought everyone around her

Took part in a great conspiracy organized by her doctor

I tested her on his order of course

My so called friends in school laughed at me

I had to hide

Nothing that was me was ok

I learned to smile and pretend

Do not say wrong things

Do not attract attention

Stay out, keep the distance

Or take part in their game

That summer I learned every nations flag in the world



Why is my life so filled with struggles?

What did I do wrong?

Who and why and when and what

The answers does not matter

Only the fact on the ground

And watching the plants grow



Freezing in the sun

Finally the spring is here

But the mind and heart still lives in the winter

It feels like the road is leading me the wrong way

But all roads in life eventually has the same end


Three strings

Drowning slowly in my own waist

I went to look for God

But he could not be found

So I went back to the city again

Trying to play the fiddle with only

Three strings