How to form a new life
Peace of mind is a hard thing
Searching for a new future
All the options is on the table
The mind is inside the loop
Future Quest
Inside
Putting the pain away
Deep inside
Procrastination as a way of
Avoiding to deal with the
Monsters living inside
Waiting to put
You down
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Ice
The ice flakes moves through the city
Falling snow in the morning
Cold nights
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Outskirts
Driving around in the outskirts of Stockholm. The snow is gone but temperature is well below zero. Discovering unknown parts of the city is way of meditation. This is old Viking country filled with burial-grounds and runestones.
This is pagan and Christian landscape at the same time, churches built on places of pagan worship, messages telling the stories of death and suffering in Russia or Turkey. A lot of fortunes were made there by Vikings being mercenaries or tradesmen.
Our barren land could not feed everyone so the bravest and most desperate left long time ago. This is not a land to be happy in. That is not the nature of Sweden. Here you work and suffers in silence until you eventually die.
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Perspective on Life
Life is getting slower when you grow old
The stories and dramas repeats itself
Every human thinks he is unique but
In reality we are just copies
Replicating patterns known from before
With some small variations
Accepting this is freedom
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I Don’t Want To Go
The end is so near
I am not ready
To end it all
Just lost the meaning
To live
Have to find a new one
I know I am not
Good enough and
That is not really
Where I want to be
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Morning Routine
Every morning the same routine
The same conflicts
And the running
Like a rat
Up and down the stairs
Running out
Coming back
Losing, not finding, forgetting
And eventually
She is gone
In a cloud of smoke
Missing the bus
And her life
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Building My World
Trying to get a manual
For a good and functional
Life, Outside my small and
Secluded world
They are ruling through fear
Not terror but fear of losing
What you have and
Being part of the losing
Angry majority
Standing on the street screaming
For bread and entertainment
Still I have to build a new small world
That is working and thriving
Like the Stoics, long gone and
Still very present
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Dealing With It All
For a long time
I was Striving to avoid
Dealing with
All the problems
They were so many,
So complicated,
And foremost,
They involved conflicts
Negotiations with other
That I felt so indebted to
But most of all it meant
That wiping up the dust
Making life more unpleasant
Than it already was
In the end
I realised that it wouldn’t matter
And my bad life
Would stay so bad
If I did not try to
Deal and solve
The problem
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Remains
History is what remains
Things that is not here
But could have been
What is not happening
As well as what is going on
What we did not do
As well the results of what
We did a long time ago
Schibolet 