Limited Options

The entrance that once was so big and dominant

Have become small and well hidden

Maybe it is not even possible to enter

The once great building in the city centre

That use to be very prominent

Now is just a discreet part of the street

Avoiding being noticed in every way

It’s balconies tremble and not

Even the desperate smokers

Venture out thereby jeopardizing

Their life and future

Age changes us but still

We remain remarkably the same

Sunday Misery Mystery

This is a truly

Bad day a time

For failure

And suffering

But…

I am enjoying the sun

Why waste time

On trying the illusion of success

When life is just outside the window

Sunset

Time is moving slowly

The insight and wisdom

Is fairly limited

It is late in life

Late for hope

Still the sun shines

Like it does every day

And waking up

Is still a great feeling

Movements

Carrying around the frustration

The lost things around me

Causes I believed in

People I use to know

Places where I felt at home

It is going, gone at a moment

The Old Man

Here I am

A very old man

With a lot of wrinkles

A lot of mindfulness

Will not help that

Time can obviously not be reversed

Life has been running it’s cause

Here we are 2020

Without friend, future or finances

Still life goes on flowing

Down, down the drain

In a systematic way

Struggle

Fighting the pain,

The fear and self-contempt

All the lost time, all the lost tears

All emotions repressed

In order to survive

And now when life is almost gone

Another try to get out of this cycle

Missing out

Trapped in the duty of caring

For children that are mine

And a bad relationship

That are also mine

I wake up at night with

The feeling of being choked

To death slowly but surly

Only the early birds singing

Like they are lost in the forest gives

Some remorse

To Live Or Die

Somehow lost

Somehow gone

And

Somehow still here

A day in the middle of life

Trying to become sane

Not losing my head

Cannot solve the riddle

Being between

What I need and

What I ought to do

Life is lost only the long road

Of dying remains if I stay

Life is gained but only

Loneliness remains

Have nothing to say

This is life in a dysfunctional family