Subway mists

And here I am again

An angry man yelling

In the street

Bothering everyone

Passing time by acting

Crazy, dirty and wretched

Scaring children, women and some men

Disturbing the so tranquil balance

Between the conditions of being a town dweller

And just a disturbed frustrated man in a to big flock

Pretending to be living an advanced life in the city of trivial

Dreams impossible to comprehend or ever achieve

But still a city with its much wider but still limited

Freedoms dating back to the free republics of

The white sea in the far south

Long gone Socrates also learned to know its

In fact very strict limitations

Drinking bad wine and talking to much

Day and night

Waste

I do not see any meaning in this life

I am just here watching

Be used, enabler for other peoples dreams

Thats what I am a vessel for genes

They don´t care if I live or die

I am just a thing

Dispensable

Losing yourself

I did not know that life could be so slow

When I was young

I did not understand that I was going to make my own nightmares come true

I could feel it but I did not listen to myself

Twenty five years later, Here I am trapped

Into a roleplay, I am always the loser making other people’s silly dreams come true

Other people’s agenda is ruling my life

Every day I fight either to change or to survive

Another day but time is running out and soon it will not matter anymore

I wish to leave it all behind and walk like a man free of burden feeling the warm sand under my feet and hear the eternal roar of angry waves hitting the stones at midnight

Uneven

It´s an uneven fight

She has the money, friends and grit

I have the depression, loneliness and sleepiness

So I lose and she wins

Good for her

Bad for me

I realize that I never again will feel free

Trying to fight the gray spaces in my mind

War in the mind

Sometimes life is just miserable

I am a prisoner of my own comfort

There is no excuse

Soon I will be gone

And it will be ok

Life is not worth that much

Just a spark in the pan

Then we are all gone forever

 

Duality

I am a lonely man

And possible a loony

As well

Here I am in my room

By myself

Enjoying the solitude

And lack of humans

I need people, I need friends

I just can´t stand them

Guess that is love

Echoes

I am so tired
Tired to the bone
The mind is aching
For something
To put it´s energy at
I lost the inner presence
Of a meaning
Looking in the dark
With a lot of questions
Who am I
What do I want
Why do I live
All this questions
Are like echoes
Hitting me in the head
With their lack of answer

The young old man

Fear is not a way to live
Peace without freedom
Is not peace but pacification
The man told me
But his land is lost
Stolen by his neighbour
And here he is
Far away smoking
His cheap cigaretts
In the camp his
former friends
guarded him
While other friends
is being tortured
Or killed
Here in the far north
He is dying a little
Bit day by day

Long, long time ago

Long time ago
I went to a war
Long, long time ago
To the valley of death
I went
Long, long time ago
The people where full of fear
I was just one lonely traveller
What could I do?
Long, long time ago
Every day there were people dead
In the street, at home at school
And every step could be your last, so fast
I put my life at stake to see the war
Long, long time ago
Then I went home to my house,
Took a deep, deep breath and enjoyed
The peace in my big, big bed
But the war would not let me go
Every night I could not forget
The trapped, the wounded and the dead
But at home nobody wanted  to hear about
That  terrible war
Long, long time ago
They said  to me, let them kill each other until they’re all dead
Let them die in their bloody war.
We have our own cats and dogs and friends
we do not care about that war
And so life went on and on and on
Until that bloody war came here
Long, long time ago
With it´s terror and fear
It took some of our dear
But the people still did not care
Because it´s not our war
It´s  not our problem anymore
If people die on the other side
Because we only care for our family and friends
Let the other die they said,
Long, long time ago
Then somebody dropped a bomb
And now they’re all dead
With their cats and dogs and other pets
Even their families and friends are all dead
So I guess it´s not their problem any more
Since, long long time ago