Bringing myself together
Trying to be strong enough
Which I am not
Going to be strong
Even though I know
I will not make it
Together
The Blunt Instrument
Searching for the
Secret code that will
Help me to get out of here
I have to run, run quickly
Get rid of all intoxication
Get wise and strong
Sleepless and energized
A total illusion
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Blind Spots
Parapraxis
What am I not seeing
What are the blind spots
The path that brought me here
It is weird
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Disruptions
I lost my life
I lost my meaning
The path disappeared
Over night,
A sort of repetitive pattern
I would show in my life
Huge contrasts and a dramatic
Breakup from past relation and meanings
Things, matter and economy became upside down
As I tried to get out of the dizziness
Finding a new way of being
It left scars in the soul
Bleeding and screaming for safety
Avoiding every risk
Making life dull and boring
And soon enough
It was time to disrupt
Again and again
Until the bitter end
That is now
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Loneliness
Suddenly I realized
How much of an outsider
That I really am
Far away from the crowd
And family
Being seen as weird
By the people
That I believed I was close to
This insight came to me after being alone
In my own cave for too long
Where can I find my people
My likes ?
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They Are You
Midnight hits hard
All the nightmares
Are here
Remembering you about
The other people’s war
But now
They are inside your head
You are them
They are you
Sharing the mind
A collective memory
In your dreams
Being the receiver
Is painful and cruel
All those stories
In your head
People screaming, suffering and dying
While you are in bed
Night after night
Please relieve me
From being me
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Submitting Myself
Calm and imbalance
Keeping the balance
Means losing my self
But living in peace
Following her every whim
Keeping her comfort
While slowly losing my will
Like a spiders web surrounding me
Suffocating everything around her
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Disoriented
When living
Life itself is
Creating pain
Inside me all the
Disappointments of
Being unable to
Achieve any of my dreams
I am still here in the north
Disoriented of directions
Schibolet 