Why

What am I doing now?

Why am I here?

No answers,

Only questions!

That are failing their purpose

That are failing their meaning

I am alone in this world

And so are you

In the end

But until then

Let us meet

Somewhere

In between the extremes

Volatile

My inner voices

Always tells me

The wrong thing

And here I am

Doing the same

Wrong things

All the time

The answer is

Always outside

Never inside

Inside is

Just a big mess

Going Down

I cannot save my world

Again I am into a battle

Against my self

I know what I want

But me, myself and I

cant do anything

To ever get there

Let it go down

Let it go down

I lost my soul

That I never had

Servitude

Fighting a hopeless war

Losing on all sides

Still it keeps me standing

Hoping to stay out of servitude

So tired, really tired

Serving the need of others

Their lazy life tears me apart

Their fulfilment of repeating

Destructive pattern are destructive

I wish I had been different myself

Meeting oneself in others trashes me

To pieces, still I try to purify myself

In this cesspool, this fountain of dirt

Worst of Days

Monday is the worst of days

Always filled with hard awakenings

The dream is over, the family drama

Has ended everybody lost

Back to the ordinary life

At work, school, unemployment or

Whatever takes you through the week

The human illusion is so vibrant

What we have to do or not to do

Just a few feet away another

Parallel world awaits us

Patiently

Sinking In

When the energy is lost

You sink into the coma of

Self-reflection steering into that

Strange mirage that pretend to be you

The turbid picture makes a strange impression

Depression and self-pity combined with

Contempt is acid for the soul

Even mindless drinking is better than that

Our mind is constructed with the Thanatos

In mind creating the option of suicide quick

Or slow that takes decades

Only mad action can cure that