Giving life to these dirty walls
Life in the aquarium
Little oxygen, little life
What feeds us, what is feeding on us
What is uncertain,
The night falls already early,
Early in the morning
Aquarium
Run Away
When things are so bad
That you can not stay
Focused and everything
Is so sad
That you cannot live anymore
You are looking for the door
To another life or no life
At all
Then is time to get away
Run far away
Before you are getting
Killed or kill yourself
Just by accident
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To Survive
Creating is surviving
Striving to grow
Out of my body
To grow out of my soul
To grow out of my brain
To outgrow my limitation
To receive
To give
To live
To die
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The World
The latent virus of the Cold War never went away
It came back to us, full of new features
The world now
Divided between the rich, affluent or just crooked
While big men with guns standing on their guard ready to kill
Or at least harm while preparing another massacre in a tiny village
The battle for the control of resources has just started again
Plans are being made, the control so important, still such a
Great illusion being extended to every corner of human existence
New types of weapons being created more efficient
In killing is being put up, to win you need to create chaos
A great ladder for climbing while we are falling
Avoiding to prepare until the very last moment
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I Don’t Want To Go
The end is so near
I am not ready
To end it all
Just lost the meaning
To live
Have to find a new one
I know I am not
Good enough and
That is not really
Where I want to be
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Grey Nights
Eternal grey clouds
Moving quickly over
The night sky
While I move across empty
Dark streets in the suburbs
Cold and tired after a
Long day,
I am received with
Angry words and demands
I do not know why
I am still here
In this sad position
It is like magic
Only the pine trees
Will be my witness
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Surviving
Fear is a good thing
Keeping you alive in the winter
Makes you run and avoid danger
The fearless might be the dead one
You find them frozen to death
In the morning
Looking like they are still alive
With open eyes
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Submitting Myself
Calm and imbalance
Keeping the balance
Means losing my self
But living in peace
Following her every whim
Keeping her comfort
While slowly losing my will
Like a spiders web surrounding me
Suffocating everything around her
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Surviving Being a Partner to a Bipolar
Living with a bipolar partner can be very traumatic. All conflicts tend to be extreme. Whatever you are doing is completely wrong. You don’t deserve any credit for anything. No matter what you have done so far is never enough.
Then after that comes the change. She is so sorry for what happened and what she has done. Then there is a slight chance that you can agree on something. This agreement she might keep or not. But the that is s good start.
Once this pattern has repeated itself enough often. One start to adapt and create strategies for handling it. Eventually however it gets you and you can give up talking about your needs since they are not acceptable if he/ she does not feel well or is frustrated for one reason or another. It can be a family quarrel with a mother or something at work. You will have to carry the burden of that by being the target of aggression and merciless criticism for something completely different like putting the children to bed too late or in the “wrong ” way.
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Shadowland
Running away from my shadow
Into the land of shadows
Embracing the darkness
The obscurity of the mind
And a feeling of dizziness
While trying to figure out
How to survive in this
Land of the night
