Rubble

Producing a lot of thoughts

Running around in circles

While I being told how bad I am

In every way by the one I once loved

So dearly, the children in their own

World playing outside only their

Older brother listening,

Trying to mitigate between us

And our hateful tirades

It is me that is leaving

Seeing no hope

What so ever

I hate this life

And still being part

Makes it no

Easier

Only the sleep

Will relieve me

Eventually

Failure and logic

Every time I fail

I feel the pain

Unable to change

Unable to move

Paralysis

Trying to meditate

But I do not find any peace of mind

I feel more and more frustrated

Will this be the rest of my life

Why do I not have the freedom of will

Keep on writing

Cascading transcendence

When I was young

I wanted to be strong and without fear

Fly all over the world with my wings

Instead I lost it all

Failed again and again

In my shame and grief

I hide in my cell

But the wound was painful, it went deep into the heart

I could not from the world stay apart

I had to repeat again and agin

What I could not do, I had to do

Again and again

And my life went into a loop

New people, new failures

To prove once and for all how bad I really am

But that was not end

I realized that I had to transcend

To see life from a different point of view

And play with a friend

And that was finally the end

Cascading failure

The energy builds up
I start to do things
I do to much
The energy is gone
I fail again and again
Back to the pit
I start climb up
Again

 

Here

Here I am again
After so many
Years

Like I have not
Learned a thing
Have not earned
Any Wisdom

Still I drive into that wall
again
With stubborn mind
Like it is the main purpose of
my life
Which might be the case