Places for Self-Destruction part 1

The family is the most destructive way

To live if it is dysfunctional

Toxic and confrontationa,

There are so many patterns, way of being

That makes you shun away from

Being in the middle of contradicting

Desires and demand

Leaves the soul empty and neurotic

Striving for a better life

But the scars are deeply ingrained

And soon enough

You fine yourself in the smae

Or similar family patterns

But with new people

Time to break up again

Contemplative Self Destruction

Here we are in this dirty place

The people that we are

Are the ones we hated yesterday

We despise ourself

Because in our own eyes

We are failures

Creatures not worth living

We thought that we had

All the answers but this is not the case

We are losers

Soon dead

Leaving the world

To be destroyed

By the more successful

Of our stupid spices

Aftermath

Life did not end

It just became more

Complicated and lonely

I did not back off

I stayed put and lost

Because I had not enough

Money and support

Or was there other reasons

The mind is moving in circles

Under the hot sun

Our history together

And my fathers projection of me

Being everything he despised

Why would he help me then?

He did see me as unable,

Unpractical, useless creature

That he had to put down

As always, as in the past

This black shadow of my life

Abstract Landscape

Anxiety is a strange feeling

The object or subject

Does not need to be real

To cause big harm, no

More dreamlike, just a state of mind

Putting the thinking and reasoning out

Of business in a very destructive way

I have been living with it all the time

Very long time, it is a handicap

It limits what you can do

I tried from time to time to do something about it

I was not very successful but I can live with my failure

However painful

And I am trying it again and again

Cascading failure running over me

Like the waves of the ocean

Sleepless Light

Life in the city can be

Like a sleepless night

There is always something

Going on, somewhere

People moving around, walking,

Biking, begging, drinking, making out

Or living in their mobile screen slowly

Losing their mind and soul to the big monster

That is Internet

Getting lost and being abused by

The big five

This ultimate madness that drives humanity

Into the dance of death

With it self late in the Holocene

The Falling Snow

After trying to keep

My head high

Someone put it to the ground

I am breaking through

Hitting and hurting myself

Falling down

Being criticised

All the things I carry

is a heavy load

Eventually we break down

Power is gone

Hope and dreams gone

Only the falling snow

Remains

Our Own Grave

Man is mans own slave

Digging his own grave

Every day

Soon we will all be gone

No one left

To sing our songs

Bad times are coming

My friend

We will all die

Together in the end

Mass extinction

It will be

You just wait

And see