No Home

Travel across the sea

On the way to home

There was no home

Anymore only

Battlefields everywhere

Life is a terrible place

Whether in war or peace

Fighting is always lost

In the end


To forgive is not easily done

Memories comes back

The perpetrator well off rich

Do not regret but celebrate

His act still after thirty years

The memory remains

An open wound

I don’t love, I do not hate

I realize that

I will not make it

I messed it up

I do not seek to forgive

I do not seek forgiveness

Anymore, just strength

To make it through

The day


Fighting a hopeless war

Losing on all sides

Still it keeps me standing

Hoping to stay out of servitude

So tired, really tired

Serving the need of others

Their lazy life tears me apart

Their fulfilment of repeating

Destructive pattern are destructive

I wish I had been different myself

Meeting oneself in others trashes me

To pieces, still I try to purify myself

In this cesspool, this fountain of dirt


The Memory is challenging

Taking new ways

Gaining new perspectives

Losing others

Pain avoidance and a childish urge

To not be embarrassing 

Empty of compassion  

Daily Destruction

So we meet again in the afternoon

To restart out fight

With mental venum

Poison for mutual destruction

Telling each other of our shortcomings

And despicable weakness

Each have our own favorite argument

Slowly breaking us down

But we never let each other go

Chained by thousand different reason

And excuses

We will drown fighting until the

Bottom of the sea

Preparing for War

Writing in my

Secret dossier

The names of friends and foes

Trying to build my fortress

To no avail

Preparing my nuclear warheads

As well as my sneezing bacteriological

Arms of mass destruction

Collecting evidence to proof

My paranoia

And all of this work

For one remark

That made me break down


You took my heart away

And I want it back