Parapraxis
What am I not seeing
What are the blind spots
The path that brought me here
It is weird
Blind Spots
The Micro Universe
The small thing determines
Our direction in life
The gigantic world and the minuscule world
Move together in disharmony
Chaos in what looks to be
A perfect order from the outside
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Do it ! Make a Big Drama Now
There are many ways
To create a drama
Life is full of it
When having a dull moment
Create a drama
When being criticized
Relate and create a big drama
Attack
When wanting power and influence
Dramatize
Every Tv-novella will help you
Maintaining the eternal cirkle
Just don’t expect progress and
Happiness
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Circles of Destruction
I don’t know how to break this pattern
Of repetition, bad connection
No action, extremely high anxiety
I recognize it all of course
That is what I carry around
The burden that limits life
I thought there was
Solutions, some miracle doctor
Solving things by talking
After 12 years I gave that up
Losing faith and hope
Drugs did not help either
Repeating patterns of destruction
Living with destructive people
Became part of life
So here I am trapped
In my own dirt and sadness
Living the life that I never wanted
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Hell On Earth
There are many ways
To have a bad life
We are all programed
To get into our own hell
Just a little luck
And God
Might save us
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My Story
My story is short
The message is not important
And very important
Since is me
Me is the center of universe
No one and nothing is more important
I even got an autograph once
Written by a very important author
Whose name I have forgotten
(After all is not my name)
She or he agreed
To something
But I cannot tell you what
All the my energy is absorbed
By thinking on me
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Round trip
Eventually we all
Bounce back to ourselves
Are old personality
Shines through as
Our weaknesses and faults
When the conditions
Gets bad enough
But when we are
There at the bottom
Then what do we do?
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The Inner World Journey
When the outer world is to hard,
To dangerous to deal with
The inner world is still here
Wherever you go
More or less present depending
On the place and situation
It follows you and it is
What really drives you
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Father
Trying to leave
The pain behind
Breaking with your
Father and your fate
Comes at a prize
I am freezing slowly
Dying
Being free is worth
Dying for
Feeling alive, a little
Again
Until next calamity
Strikes
And I am on the street
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Surviving Being a Partner to a Bipolar
Living with a bipolar partner can be very traumatic. All conflicts tend to be extreme. Whatever you are doing is completely wrong. You don’t deserve any credit for anything. No matter what you have done so far is never enough.
Then after that comes the change. She is so sorry for what happened and what she has done. Then there is a slight chance that you can agree on something. This agreement she might keep or not. But the that is s good start.
Once this pattern has repeated itself enough often. One start to adapt and create strategies for handling it. Eventually however it gets you and you can give up talking about your needs since they are not acceptable if he/ she does not feel well or is frustrated for one reason or another. It can be a family quarrel with a mother or something at work. You will have to carry the burden of that by being the target of aggression and merciless criticism for something completely different like putting the children to bed too late or in the “wrong ” way.
Schibolet 