Shaming

So the story goes

My friend has been shamed

On the internet tribune

There is no justice

Anymore, just opinions

Anyone, anywhere

With or without reason

Entertainment for the masses

Destruction for the community

But life is more than that

Or not

A Fake Life

To live without an income

Is to live in the shadow

Of other people’s money

Their will and their whim

Moves you around like

A puppet

The shame is great enough

To kill you, through you

In front of a train or tram

Instead you hide

Building a fake identity

That eventually becomes

What you are

Not solving, just hiding

Because the shame

Is so great

Where to start from that?

Answer to Shame

I am on the run

From the shame of being

Such a bad father

Being such an incompetent son

And impotent lover as well

No one loves my soul

I am so bad

And I am so tired of being

Projected as bad for not fulfilling

Other people’s dreams

I am not bad

Just the answer to your projections

Hide Out

Fear and shames

Took me here

Hiding from

Everyone

Trying to erase

My existence

As much as

Possible

Failure is

Always

Unforgivable

I never try

Again

I always say

Who Silenced Me?

What made me silent

What happened

Why did I hide in shame

For so long

Why can’t I protect my self

From other peoples aggressions

So many questions

So few answers

Cascading failure

Feeling bad and crazy

I manage to repeat

My failure today again

Frustration and shame

Is so hard to carry around

I wish that  was Different

But time past is time lost

Only the long days will ease

The pain

Shame

Meeting the pain
Seeing my failed
Inner self

I am trying to hide
Hide from shame
My shame is hard to carry
I lost my self
I lost my soul
And now I am climbing
Out of that hole
Acceptens is gold
But better is breaking
Patterns

The wall

 

Fighting the lonely battle

Again and again

Why is life so filled

With repetition

Why can I not change

I am trying

Again and again

Banging my head into the wall