I cannot make it anymore
No meaning to do this
Still I am up to it
On Writing
This is my backbone
My faith, my savior
My last stand
In a confusing world
Where the mess cannot be
Made up anymore
No it fills the entire
Room with its noise
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Panic
When losing control
Very early in the morning
A feeling of
Great panic
Still that is an illusion
We never have control
Just a belief and a will
That takes all the
Oxygen in the rooom
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On Accepting
Staying silent is
Accepting the repression
Putting your agency away
Accepting destruction
Turning force and anger
Inside will eventually
Destroy your strength
Your judgment
In the start it is easy
Soon you will lose your track
Your path in life, waking up
As an old man lost in the
Mountains
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Wrath
Being angry
Does not solve
Anything
Still it feels
So good,
I love wrath
True righteous anger
Giving such a strength
And motivation
Unfortunately it goes away
Too quickly
Leaving a feeling of burnout
And empty mind
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Creative Self Destruction
Remembering all the loses
I had in my life
The incomplete feeling of
Being incompetent
Being in the wrong place
The wrong time
All the time!
What matters is
The things that gives
Strength and hope
No problems are solved
By self destruction
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Transfer
Freeing the mind
Opening up new options
After a long depression
I am here
Still confused and tired
But I will not give in
I have just started
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No Surrender
I cannot submit
Only show my
Strength
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Underground Backroom
Falling down
From the sky
Back to the dirty
Backrooms of the world
Not being cleaned
For years
Only the memory
Keeps me hopeful
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Revenge
To forgive is not easily done
Memories comes back
The perpetrator well off rich
Do not regret but celebrate
His act still after thirty years
The memory remains
An open wound
I don’t love, I do not hate
I realize that
I will not make it
I messed it up
I do not seek to forgive
I do not seek forgiveness
Anymore, just strength
To make it through
The day
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